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.They are moving and coming together in my chest.That is where the sadness is.”“Good.Now stay with it for as long as if you can bear it.What does it feel like? Does it have a particular shape? Does it have a colour?”Once again she sat quietly trying to get answers to these questions.“It feels a bit like a millstone.I thought it was black at first but it is a dark grey now,” she finally replied.“Good, very good.Now I want you to thank the millstone and then release it from its duties.The feelings it represents have served you well and were an important part of the process.Acknowledge the positive role it has played in your life and eliminate all anger or bad feelings you have towards it.It is important that you part as friends,” David said, sounding very confident and knowledgeable.“Okay,” Hanna said after a short while.“I have done that.”“Empty your mind.You are now waiting for a helper to come and take the stone from your chest and remove it from your life altogether.Take your time to imagine what that person would look like.When you can see him or her, welcome them, and then let them help you.”Hanna took a long time sitting with her eyes closed.“They are here.A monk with a brown robe and a woman engulfed in shining white light,” then she fell silent again.David said nothing now and just watched her as she was slightly moving to the left and to the right of her chair, then she let out a huge sigh and then opened her eyes.“Wow! That was intense,” Hanna said, shaking her body.“Did they remove the stone?” David asked.“Yes, they did.It was very heavy.The two of them took a while to unhinge it, but then it all went really quickly.”“Where is the stone now?”“They took it with them; into the light.I almost laughed at the images: it seemed such a cliché,” she admitted.“I have done visualisations like this before but the more worldly and rational part of me still finds it difficult to accept.”“But it helped?” David said hopefully.“Yes.I feel much lighter,” Hanna was pleased to tell him.“Then that’s really good isn’t it.”Chapter 20: SwansAfter Biddy had woken from her afternoon nap, Walter took her on the famous walk behind the development.The old couple were fortunate enough to see the same dog chasing swans on the lake.The weather had been fantastic and Biddy returned from the walk on another high; just like the day before.Her zest for life, her happiness and positive attitude were intoxicating for Walter, and showed him that she was still his Biddy.He wondered how long it had been since he had a proper conversation with his wife.The decline had been so sly that it was hard to pin-point a particular moment when their exchanges had turned into something less.Discussions had gradually stopped being abstract or highbrow and had homed in on practical issues, and the petty little things in the here and now.He missed the partner he had lost to the disease, but was able to console himself that the loveable woman he married was still around.That was the woman he feared losing when Biddy went through the irritable and angry phase.While it was incredibly hard to accept that he could have only parts of her, and not the whole person anymore, he was content with the Biddy he had now; more a child than a wife at times, but full of the gentleness and sweetness he so treasured.Preparing dinner had been a bit of an ordeal for Walter.To begin with, he had to go and get some shopping from a local express supermarket, whose stock was far too limited for his liking and demands.He had to take Biddy with him and that had not helped him focus.Back in the kitchen it took him some time to find anything, he spent ages looking for knives, pans and chopping boards, as well as the basic ingredients he had not thought of buying.It proved very hard work, especially since Biddy had a surge of energy and wanted to help, which involved putting things away again and making a mess of Walter’s organised processes
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